As I have previously posted, ARD meetings are not something Tina and I enjoy. However, the one we participated in Wednesday may change our mind on the subject.
We met with most of Amanda's education team. Some of the these therapists have been working with her for more than five years. Now while we have had road blocks in the past from the diagnostician, this time there was overwhelming support for Amanda on all fronts. More importantly, everyone was saying the same thing and reinforcing the consensus of Amanda's needs as well as achievements.
But the highlight of the ARD was when the dance instructor, who has never participated in our ARD before, told us the following. "I know you have heard this before but you have never heard it from me, I love Amanda. The kids in my class love Amanda. She tries very hard and all the students look out for her." My heart went to about 200 beats a minute and I came as close to crying in a room full of women as I ever have before. It just made me feel so warm inside.
Amanda will be moved to a less academically challenging class in the fall. It will have more of an emphasis on life skills, which is an area she can actually improve in and contribute to society as a whole. Not every child is destined for greatness, but that doesn't mean they can't be amazing in their own right. I'm proud of my girl.
Friday, April 3, 2009
Monday, March 30, 2009
Water For Elephants and Lonesome Dove
I finished reading Water For Elephants on Saturday and I have to say I really liked it. Uncle Al was Evil, August was crazy and it just worked so well. I won't say much about the book other than that because I don't wish to reveal any twists to someone who hasn't read it yet.
When I was younger I did not enjoy books written in the first person. I found them to be narcissistic simply because I could not separate writer from narrator. But I had a new awaking to the style about ten years ago while reading a lot of nonfiction and it has opened me up to a vast amount of great works.
I'm working on the BBC top 100 now. I checked the list a few weeks ago and had discovered that I had read 22 so far. I read "Animal Farm" a couple of weeks ago and am now reading "The Kite Runner." I refuse to read Dickens because I have seen so many of his works on stage and screen that I feel I will be wasting my reading hours. I'll need to get past 50 so I feel like I have accomplished something. However, I was disappointed that the BBC did not recognize my favorite novel of all time, "Lonesome Dove."
I read this book when I was 19 years old and it started to open my eyes. Gus and Call were two sides of the same coin, but when it comes down to it I had to identify with Gus. Call created and emotional prison for himself and had a life without love our family. Gus was a free wheeler who had married three times and never stopped loving Claire, his first love. His attitude of, "It's not dying I'm talking about, it's living." Is a great motto.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Curve Ball
The interview was different than we thought. Unlike interviews in years past, this one was not for a special education class but for a speech/debate course. The topic was Pro 100% mainstreaming of special education. The problem is that Tina and I are against it. Amanda has been placed in mainstream classes and they simply did not work out. Even when she was seven years old and placed in a kindergarten class it was too advanced for her.
Tina and I are very aware that our child does not fall in the spectrum of normal. Instead of denying this fact and trying to force the world and her to blindly include her, we take care of her the way she needs it. We know she doesn't do normal things, at best she mimics a lot of behaviors but we don't delude the fact that she can't do a lot of things that other 11 year old girls can do. But we also know she is a sweet girl who when loved is as gentle a soul as you will ever know and having her in your life can make you a better person.
So, we didn't do the interview but the girls weren't upset with it. They were still having trouble with the topic. As education majors I think they should have picked a subject they didn't care so deeply about, make the argument and get the grade. After all, it's just college.
Tina and I are very aware that our child does not fall in the spectrum of normal. Instead of denying this fact and trying to force the world and her to blindly include her, we take care of her the way she needs it. We know she doesn't do normal things, at best she mimics a lot of behaviors but we don't delude the fact that she can't do a lot of things that other 11 year old girls can do. But we also know she is a sweet girl who when loved is as gentle a soul as you will ever know and having her in your life can make you a better person.
So, we didn't do the interview but the girls weren't upset with it. They were still having trouble with the topic. As education majors I think they should have picked a subject they didn't care so deeply about, make the argument and get the grade. After all, it's just college.
Someone wants to know what I think
I am to be interviewed after work today by a an education major. She is required to interview the parent of a special needs parent for one of her classes. Tina has done this interview for several students the past few years and asked if I would do it this time to provide a fresh perspective.
My job as a father and husband in the area of Amanda's education is to be both the unstoppable force and immovable object. A difference of opinion with school administration is an area where Tina is an awesome corner man. She tells me what she wants done and I do it. After years of dealing with distributors and contractors I find administrators and teachers to be a PG version remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Tina shouldn't have to bare the weight of conflicts though. In my vows I promised to protect her, and really the greatest threat to her health and happiness is an unyielding administrator. So, that is what I gladly do.
I have dubbed an ARD meeting, "A Reason to Die." The room has Tina and I in it along with about eight adminstrators, teachers, and therapists. The meeting starts with the principal reading the rules that the meeting will be civil and not personal. Then it is turned over the to head of special education at the school who starts with, "Let's talk about your mentally retarded daughter." Yep, just love that woman.
Anyway, I digress. Back to the interview. Tina hasn't told me what the questions will be. She said she wants to see me handle it like she had to the first time. I feel fortunate that the young woman who is conducting the interview is actually one of Amanda's two frequent sitters. So I know she will not try to rile me up or break me down. She is a dear friend of both Amanda and Tina, and I think she thinks I'm ok too.
So for my three readers I know of, thats about it from TXK.
My job as a father and husband in the area of Amanda's education is to be both the unstoppable force and immovable object. A difference of opinion with school administration is an area where Tina is an awesome corner man. She tells me what she wants done and I do it. After years of dealing with distributors and contractors I find administrators and teachers to be a PG version remake of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Tina shouldn't have to bare the weight of conflicts though. In my vows I promised to protect her, and really the greatest threat to her health and happiness is an unyielding administrator. So, that is what I gladly do.
I have dubbed an ARD meeting, "A Reason to Die." The room has Tina and I in it along with about eight adminstrators, teachers, and therapists. The meeting starts with the principal reading the rules that the meeting will be civil and not personal. Then it is turned over the to head of special education at the school who starts with, "Let's talk about your mentally retarded daughter." Yep, just love that woman.
Anyway, I digress. Back to the interview. Tina hasn't told me what the questions will be. She said she wants to see me handle it like she had to the first time. I feel fortunate that the young woman who is conducting the interview is actually one of Amanda's two frequent sitters. So I know she will not try to rile me up or break me down. She is a dear friend of both Amanda and Tina, and I think she thinks I'm ok too.
So for my three readers I know of, thats about it from TXK.
Monday, March 23, 2009
The Travelers Are Home
We just got back in town last night after five days in Willis, TX to see Tina's parents. Amanda finds the place to be fascinating. Normal people succumb to boredom in about 45 minutes. One of the only things Willis has going for it is cheap liquor, of which I took advantage of out of necessity. Since I stopped drinking beer at the beginning of this year I find liquor to be a good substitute.
On the upside, Amanda had a nice time just hanging out with her grandparents. They went to an open mike gospel night where her grandfather sang a solo and then in his group. Also, the MC of the night had the entire congregation sing Happy Birthday to Amanda. She loved it.
Another bonus to this trip over years past is Amanda now travels well. Up until about a year ago being in the car with her for more than 30 minutes would fall under the heading of cruel and unusual punishment. I remember once, about seven years ago, Amanda cried from my driveway to her grandparents driveway. That is a total of 270 miles. She did stop crying when we stopped to eat in Marshall. As soon as we were back in the car she fired it right back up. Amanda wasn't much for the concept of time. She wanted to be there right then and right now and she just didn't care who she was killing.
Another time we were coming back from Little Rock, AR after a trip to Arkansas Children's Hospital. We had a 1999 GMC Yukon and Amanda was screaming like a torture victim. I was steadily going faster until I had the big SUV going just over 90 mph. Normally Tina would say something, but she was wanting home as much as me. And then we were passed by a Suburban. Tina just popped off and said, "He must have twins." Still the funniest thing I have ever heard under those circumstances.
But this time, as the last time, Amanda traveled perfectly. She sat in the front seat with Tina on the drive down until we got to Nacogdoches where we ate lunch. Afterwards she got in the back with Tina while I drove the rest of the way. On the drive home she rode in the front with me until Lufkin and then stayed up front with Tina. An upside to driving a Lincoln MKZ is it is smooth enough to read in the backseat while going down US 59. I read a lot of Water For Elephants while Tina and Amanda talked about "girl stuff." Leg shaving is the new thing for Amanda.
Anyway, the drive is done, we are home and tonight is bowling night (see earlier posts).
On the upside, Amanda had a nice time just hanging out with her grandparents. They went to an open mike gospel night where her grandfather sang a solo and then in his group. Also, the MC of the night had the entire congregation sing Happy Birthday to Amanda. She loved it.
Another bonus to this trip over years past is Amanda now travels well. Up until about a year ago being in the car with her for more than 30 minutes would fall under the heading of cruel and unusual punishment. I remember once, about seven years ago, Amanda cried from my driveway to her grandparents driveway. That is a total of 270 miles. She did stop crying when we stopped to eat in Marshall. As soon as we were back in the car she fired it right back up. Amanda wasn't much for the concept of time. She wanted to be there right then and right now and she just didn't care who she was killing.
Another time we were coming back from Little Rock, AR after a trip to Arkansas Children's Hospital. We had a 1999 GMC Yukon and Amanda was screaming like a torture victim. I was steadily going faster until I had the big SUV going just over 90 mph. Normally Tina would say something, but she was wanting home as much as me. And then we were passed by a Suburban. Tina just popped off and said, "He must have twins." Still the funniest thing I have ever heard under those circumstances.
But this time, as the last time, Amanda traveled perfectly. She sat in the front seat with Tina on the drive down until we got to Nacogdoches where we ate lunch. Afterwards she got in the back with Tina while I drove the rest of the way. On the drive home she rode in the front with me until Lufkin and then stayed up front with Tina. An upside to driving a Lincoln MKZ is it is smooth enough to read in the backseat while going down US 59. I read a lot of Water For Elephants while Tina and Amanda talked about "girl stuff." Leg shaving is the new thing for Amanda.
Anyway, the drive is done, we are home and tonight is bowling night (see earlier posts).
Monday, March 16, 2009
10 pounds a year
Amanda is 11 years old now. When she was born she weighed 2 lbs 12 ozs. and was the smallest person I had ever met. She is now 112 pounds and a solid one at that.
She had a great low key birthday. Everywhere she went in town she saw people who know and love her. She is as happy a child as you can ever know and she just wants to be friends with whomever she meets.
Happy Birthday Little One.
She had a great low key birthday. Everywhere she went in town she saw people who know and love her. She is as happy a child as you can ever know and she just wants to be friends with whomever she meets.
Happy Birthday Little One.
Wednesday, March 11, 2009
She didn't need me but she thought she did
Right after I posted yesterday I left the office to make a delivery of a small fitting to a local customer. I was there about ten minutes when Tina gave me a call from the pediatrician's office and said that Amanda was going to need blood work. The little girl has had a very sour stomach for the past four days and we needed to get her checked out. She went with Tina and not both of us because she said she is growing up and she wouldn't need a shot.
I made the five mile drive quickly and walked into the clinic and saw my two lovely ladies about to the board the elevator. Amanda saw me and said, "They trick me." It was pretty cute the way she was more put out with the matter than scared.
She and I went back in the lab, I sat beside her and she was braver than she has ever been for blood work. You have to believe me when I say this child has had more than her share of blood work in her almost eleven years.
Afterward we went home for lunch and then I went onto the office for the rest of the day. He stomach is getting better but because she has had such a difficult winter with infections and antibiotics she has developed another problem. Let's just say I had to deal with a true Tasmanian Devil this morning. So it was back to the doctor for some meds for that particular problem and because it is cold and raining today I was requested to help. So we went through that. All part of being the dad, or at least this dad.
I made the five mile drive quickly and walked into the clinic and saw my two lovely ladies about to the board the elevator. Amanda saw me and said, "They trick me." It was pretty cute the way she was more put out with the matter than scared.
She and I went back in the lab, I sat beside her and she was braver than she has ever been for blood work. You have to believe me when I say this child has had more than her share of blood work in her almost eleven years.
Afterward we went home for lunch and then I went onto the office for the rest of the day. He stomach is getting better but because she has had such a difficult winter with infections and antibiotics she has developed another problem. Let's just say I had to deal with a true Tasmanian Devil this morning. So it was back to the doctor for some meds for that particular problem and because it is cold and raining today I was requested to help. So we went through that. All part of being the dad, or at least this dad.
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